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Punker is an Asshole

By Punkerslut

Image by Havok
Image: "Kalisti 75, Scene 1" by Havok

Start Date: Tuesday, November 25, 2003
Finish Date: Sunday, November 30, 2003

     Imagine that I took an enormous amount of Salvia Divinorum 10x. Now, imagine this psychedelic drug rushing through my veins, altering my reality and my perception greatly, showing me things which before had been hidden by my subconscious. A great deal of honesty would emerge, as I found that everyone I dealt with, I was completely honest, completely sincere. In any event, that honesty and sincerity would probably led to some rather assholish remarks, deserving of being in an article.

First Encounter...

Punkerslut: Your livejournal sucks ass.
EmoGirl: why
Punkerslut: One entry was in French, and the other was just song lyrics.
Punkerslut: ..... unnecessary song lyrics.
EmoGirl: um, the journal is friends only.
Punkerslut: Regardless, it's lame.
Punkerslut: I mean, come on.
EmoGirl: you can't see it unless you have a livejournal
Punkerslut: Oh I do.
Punkerslut: I use it to look at other lame ass journals.
EmoGirl: can you do me the favor, of not talking to me, unless you have something meaningful to say?
Punkerslut: Meaningful? Bah.... Does that mean I have to start every sentence off with a song lyric and/or French phrase?
Punkerslut: Et tu brutae, your live journal sucks!
EmoGirl: why are you such an asshole?
Punkerslut: lol
EmoGirl signed off at 1:51:24 PM.

Second Encounter...

Douchebag: woot woot
Punkerslut: What?
Douchebag: almost got into a fight about 10 mins ago
Douchebag: lol
Punkerslut: You're a fucking tard.
Douchebag: hey
Douchebag: i wouldnt have started it
Punkerslut: Still, dude.
Douchebag: i would have finished it
Punkerslut: You're a tard. The perfect American. I'd say you're no brains and all brawn, but even the latter part would be an absurd mistatement.
Douchebag: lol yeah im sure dickhead
Punkerslut: Whoa, I'm a dickhead... Let's not say things we can't take back.
Douchebag: wow
Douchebag: why are you such an asshole, what did I do to you?
Punkerslut: I'm an asshole in general.
Douchebag: oh ok
Punkerslut: Actually, I was just being honest.
Punkerslut: That's what I think about you. Not really thoughtful, sort of dumb, trendy, etc..
Douchebag: mmm im dumb, and not thoughtful
Douchebag: right
Douchebag: you don't know me too well then
Punkerslut: Okay, I'm sorry.... You're the fucking epitome of thoughtfulness and caring. Does that make you happy?
Douchebag: no
Punkerslut: Oh, darn.
Douchebag: are you drunk?
Punkerslut: More sober than I've ever been.
Douchebag: woah
Douchebag: i think you need a drink
Punkerslut: I think it'll take a lot more than a drink to help you, though.
Douchebag: alright
Douchebag: go eat some shit too then
Punkerslut: Yeah, I pretty much think that what you do and what you think can be summed up as "eating shit."
Douchebag: good comeback
Douchebag: i wish i could use my intelligence to come up with stuff like that
Punkerslut: Dude, just.... stop talking. You're not helping yourself.
Douchebag: ok loser
Douchebag signed off at 4:26:38 PM.

Third Encounter...

OddOne: Oi OI!
Punkerslut: oi
OddOne: check out this sweet band http://www.sundaedrive.com.
Punkerslut: ..... who is this?
OddOne: Sorry, my name is Stacey.
Punkerslut: Do I know you?
OddOne: Do I sound like someone u know?
Punkerslut: Yeah, I know a few Stacy's.
OddOne: thats nice.
Punkerslut: Yeah..... It is. Real nice.
OddOne: yo?
Punkerslut: Mmmm?
OddOne: hmmm, what do you want to talk about?
Punkerslut: I 'unno.... how'd you get my screen name?
OddOne: a friend said we would get along, I dunno.
Punkerslut: Weird..... which friend was this?
OddOne: how old are you?
Punkerslut: Old enough.
OddOne: old is never a good thing, whether its age, appliaces, potato salad, never a good thing, lol.
Punkerslut: It is for beer, and chocolate, and, uhhh..... wine.
Punkerslut: I wonder what else they put alcohol in....
OddOne: i hate this heat! its driving me crazy.
Punkerslut: Yeah, damned Ecuador weather.
OddOne: the weather is fine, nice and sunny.

[Uuuhhhh? Heh.]

OddOne: have you been to AIMDude.com? i found a bunch of cool buddy icons and aim punters there
Punkerslut: That sounds like a real lame site.
Punkerslut: No offense.
OddOne: how old r you?
Punkerslut: And your screen name sucks.
Punkerslut: Old enough.
OddOne: a friend said we would get along.
Punkerslut: You said that.
Punkerslut: You douchebag.
OddOne: old is never a good thing, whether its age, appliaces, potato salad, never a good thing, lol.
Punkerslut: ROBOT!!!! DIE!!!!!!! I'm afraid it's okay to jeopardize this mission, HAL!!!!!
OddOne: grrrr.
Punkerslut: ....
OddOne: So do you have a job?
Punkerslut: Shutup! Robots don't have feelings!
OddOne: your pretty cute!
Punkerslut: Go to hell, old bag!
OddOne: old is no good.
Punkerslut: You said that!
Punkerslut: ROBOTS DIE!
OddOne: Leave me out of this. i did nothing wrong.
Punkerslut: DIE DIE DIE!!!!!! *stab!*
OddOne: I love this band, http://www.sundaedrive.com.
Punkerslut: I think that band blows ass.
Punkerslut: You know what band blows ass? Sundaedrive.com band.
OddOne: OMG I love this band http://www.sundaedrive.com.
Punkerslut: Shutup, you fucking communist robot.
Punkerslut: Communist robot bitch.
Punkerslut: Bitch.
Punkerslut: Robot communist bitch robot.
OddOne: I hate my little brother, he is such a pain.
Punkerslut: Your little brother!? YOU MEAN A BLENDER!?!?
OddOne: Do you see your family often?
Punkerslut: I hope you burn and suffer.
OddOne: You have been talking to a computer! One of your friends is now reading the whole conversation and laughing it up! GET EVEN! Have the bot talk to all your friends by visiting http://aim.wasystems.net
Punkerslut: Wow, that's, uhhh.... yeah.
Punkerslut: Ass.

Random Drug Bits...

The Plastic Jesus: I might buy it, I dont know. Should I?
Punkerslut: You already preordered it, you bastard.
Punkerslut: You confessed to me in tears, remember?
The Plastic Jesus: I ordered an older against me! album.
Punkerslut: You said you preordered the newest one!
The Plastic Jesus: no, I never did that.
The Plastic Jesus: lol
Punkerslut: Whateva', foo'., I know what I read.
The Plastic Jesus: I know what I said, bitc,
Punkerslut: Just because I do drugs all the time dosen't mean brain gone.
The Plastic Jesus: lol

Punkerslut: The gateway drug theory, NiD.
Punkerslut: ..... it means that 200 million Americans are secretly heroin addicts, because they all started with weed.
Punkerslut: Hey, does the government lie?
Punkerslut: YAY!

Punkerslut: Holy good goddamn hell, why aren't doing drugs!?
Punkerslut: why aren't I*
Punkerslut: God, I think I just answered the question.
The Plastic Jesus: lol

The Plastic Jesus: Man, I wish drugs didn't bad side-effects.
Punkerslut: lol
Punkerslut: That's hilarious.


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